“Picture yourself walking through a meadow. There is a path opening before you. As you walk, you feel hungry. Look to your left. There’s a fruit tree in full bloom. Pick what you need.”
Thus began one day’s reading, this week, from The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency, by Melodie Beattie.
It continued, in dreamlike fashion…
”Steps later, you notice you’re thirsty. On your right, there’s a fresh water spring.
When you are tired, a resting place emerges. When you are lonely, a friend appears to walk with you. When you get lost, a teacher with a map appears.
Before long, you notice the flow: need and supply; desire and fulfillment… Maybe I had to feel the need, so I would notice and accept the gift. Maybe closing my eyes to the desire closes my arms to its fulfillment.
Demand and supply, desire and fulfillments – a continuous cycle, unless we break it. All the necessary supplies have already been planned and provided for this journey.
Today, everything I need shall be supplied to me.”
When I got to the end of the day, I realized that it had come true.
* * *
* * *
Walking in a meadow with eyes wide open has something to do with acceptance. From today’s reading, Sunday April 3rd…
“Surrender to the moment. Ride it out and through, for all it’s worth. Throw yourself into it.
So much of our anguish is created when we are in resistance. So much relief, release, and change are possible when we accept, simply accept.
We waste our time, expend our energy, and make things harder by resisting, repressing, and denying. Repressing our thoughts will not make them disappear. Repressing a thought already formed will not make us a better person. Think it. Let it come into reality. Then release it. A thought is not forever. If we don’t like it, we can think another one or change it. But to do that, we must accept and release the first thought.
Resistance and repression will not change a thing. They will put us at war with our thoughts.
We make life harder by resisting and repressing our feelings. No matter how dark, how uncomfortable, how unjustified, how surprising, how “inappropriate “ we might deem our feelings, resisting and repressing them will not free us from them. Doing that will make them worse. They will swirl inside us, torment us, make us sick, make our body ache, compel us to do compulsive things, keep us awake, or put us to sleep.
In the final analysis, all that we’re really called on to do is accept our feelings by feeling them, and saying, “Yes, this is what I feel.”
Feelings are for the present moment. The more quickly we can accept a feeling, the more quickly we will move on to the next.
Resisting or repressing thoughts and feelings does not change us or turn us into the person we want to be or think we should be. It puts us in resistance to reality. It makes us repressed. Eventually, it makes us depressed.
Resisting events or circumstances in our life does not change things, no mattter how undesirable the events or circumstances may be.
Acceptance turns us into the person we are and want to be. Acceptance empowers the events and circumstances to turn around for the better.
What do we do if we’re in resistance, in a tug-of-war with some reality in our life? Accepting our resistance can help us get through that too.
Acceptance does not mean we’re giving our approval. It does not mean surrendering to the will and plans of another. It does not mean commitment. It is not forever. It is for the present moment. Acceptance does not make things harder; it makes things easier. Acceptance does not mean we accept abuse or mistreatment; it does not mean we forego ourselves, or boundaries, hopes, dreams, desires, or wants. It means we accept what is, so we know what to do to take care of ourselves and what boundaries we need to set. It means we accept what is and who we are at the moment, so we are free to change and grow.
Acceptance and surrender move us forward on this journey. Force does not work.
Acceptance and surrender – two concepts that hurt the most before we do them.
* * *